Goodbye and Hello!

Goodbye Blogspot, Hello Wordpress!

As of today, I have moved here so please update your links and visit me at my new site ya?

I Cringe

EDITED: I now think that this is so bad, it's amusing.

I cringe.

Achmed the Dead Terrorist

Say Hi to Achmed the Dead Terrorist.

Stop the Bullets, Kill the Gun

This is a bloody brilliant conceptual clip with tons of meaning stacked behind it. Check it out!

Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea!

I'd like to introduce you to a chant/rhyme that I've picked up in '04. There isn't a specific name to it, but most of my friends refer to it as the "Diarrhoea Chant". It's a little different from other chants/rhymes because it doesn't exactly have an ending to it; you can keep adding to it and take it as far as your creativity permits.

Here's how it goes:

Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2) Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2)
I was walking out the door when I saw it on the floor!
Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2) Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2)
I was trying to keep it in when it flowed down to my shin!
Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2) Diarrhoea! (Clap x 2)

Go on! Add on to it! Let me know so I can update the list!

Pop Icons

Pop icons. It is not uncommon to see them emblazoned on a wide variety of apparels these days, and because of that, you’d see them at almost every corner of the street even though they have already passed away for decades or so. Drop in at any apparel shop along Far East or The Heeren and you’d see what I mean.

While the legacies of these icons have been further extended beyond music records through this, it is a tragic thing to note that most of those who don these clothes know little or nothing about them. The furthest their knowledge of these icons goes is something like – oh, Jimi Hendrix is supposed to have an afro hairdo and Marilyn Monroe somehow always has her hands neatly tucked in between her knees in a desperate attempt to conceal what lies beneath her skirt. That’s about it. And that, really, isn’t much at all.

I’ve attempted to uncover some of the lesser known things about 3 of my all time favorite icons in hope that after you’ve read it, these icons will no longer remain as mere pictures, portraits or words on cloth or paper.

Jimi Hendrix (1942 – 1970)
Do You Know That Jimi Hendrix was not the one who discovered or pioneered the technique of guitar feedback with overdriven amplifiers? The person who actually did was Buddy Guy – a blues guitar virtuoso whom Hendrix cited as a major influence. In fact, the influence was so great that Hendrix began to emulate Guy’s crazy stage antics and flamboyant dress sense throughout his career. Many have erroneously believed that Guy copied Hendrix, but it was really the opposite.

Do You Know That Jimi Hendrix played his guitar upside down? You see, Hendrix was left-handed and during his time, there weren’t many left-handed guitars around. To counter this, Hendrix acquired a normal right-handed Fender Stratocaster, flipped it over and restrung the guitar strings such that the 6th E string would not be at the bottom, but at the top, just as how it would be if the guitar was on the right side up. Hendrix’s friend, Eric Clapton, had planned to give him a left-handed Fender Stratocaster on his birthday, but unfortunately, Hendrix passed away one day after the guitar was purchased.

Do You Know That Jimi Hendrix belongs to a club called “The 27 Club” or “Forever 27 Club”? This club is for a group of famous and influential guitarists who passed away when they were 27 years old. Some of these notable guitarists are Jim Morrison of The Doors and Kurt Cobain of Nirvana.

Sid Vicious (1957 – 1979)
Do You Know That though Sid Vicious was the bassist of the Sex Pistols, he never actually played the bass for them? His bass was actually left unplugged during live performances and his parts in albums were recorded by another member of the Sex Pistols. All of these happened largely because Vicious could not play at all! In fact, he was so desperate to learn that he even approached the bassist of Motorhead and asked that he taught him how to play. Vicious eventually died in 1979 without ever knowing how to play the bass.

Do You Know That Sid Vicious was believed to have killed his girlfriend while he was under influence of heroin? He claimed not to have any recollection of the event after waking up to find his partner dead in the room. Though there were many conspiracy theories that surrounded this, none have ever been established as true.

Do You Know That Sid Vicious died after a heroin overdose and not during one? After obtaining heroin on the night of his death, Vicious overdosed but survived it. He subsequently fell asleep and was found dead the next morning. The coroner who reviewed his case explained that a person’s heart will slow down with every REM phase if he falls asleep after an accidental overdose on heroin. It is also interesting to note that the purity of the drug that Vicious consumed was exceptionally high. It was nearly 99% pure as opposed to the common standard of 22% or less. Again, conspiracy theories surrounded Vicious’ death and the most famous of them all was one that actually linked his death to the purported murderer - Rockets Redglare – of his former girlfriend.

Marilyn Monroe (1926 – 1962)
Do You Know That the name Marilyn Manson was derived from Marilyn Monroe? I don’t know about you, but I think it is an insult to have such a creep named after her. Personal opinion though, don’t take it to heart. Anyway, as an interesting side note, Marilyn Monroe herself was named after a famous Broadway star of the 1920s and early 1930s, Marilyn Miller. If you pay attention to all their names, their initials are actually consistent – “M.M.” Now, I wonder if that’s a winning formula to stardom...

Do You Know That Marilyn Monroe’s beauty and elegance were not exactly natural? Many have questioned the authenticity of her breasts, eyes and jaws, but no one was ever able to give any solid evidence that they were fake – well, except for her nose. In 1946 when Monroe was signed to 20th Century Fox, she was advised to undergo rhinoplasty to reduce the size of her nose in order to make it look more delicate and feminine. Some have speculated that because of Monroe, plastic surgery eventually found its way into Hollywood and became one of the most vital aspects of the industry.

Do You Know That Marilyn Monroe was the first centerfold model to appear on the very first edition of Playboy in 1953? The issue was an instant success and was sold out within a matter of weeks. Some copies of the first issue in mint condition were auctioned off for over $5000 in 2002 – that is 10,000 times the original price which stood at about $0.50 in 1953!

Writer's Block, AGAIN!

This is almost the 20th time that I've come to my blog's dashboard hoping to have something in mind to write about, but I just can't do it.

I think my life is too boring and uneventful. Well, it's either that or my brain's really slowing down. Oh dear, I wonder if I'm becoming a retard.

Wait, I just realized that I have actually blogged about something! HA! This is so pathetic, I can't believe that I have to resort to this just to write something.

Random Thoughts Part 1

Random Thoughts

1. All the good men left are either married or gay; all the good women left are either married or wasting their entire life trying to believe otherwise about the first part of this statement.
2. Joy would be meaningless without sadness. Utopia is therefore a place of monotony.
3. Emos are losers who pride themselves in being, uhm.. well… losers.
4. What happened to Hitler?
5. Wouldn’t age be more accurate if it is based on maturity instead of years?
6. Physical beauty is temporal.
7. John Mayer is a genius, I hope he doesn’t die early like other geniuses.
8. Why do you even bother reading this?
9. Why did I even bother blogging about this?
10. Don’t take all these seriously, it is after all, just thoughts coming from a deranged sociopath.
11. There is no Number 11.

Unglam Moments in Sports

Ownage

I would like to draw your attention to the guy at the bottom left hand corner. What a wuss.

Darth Humour

Darth and the Blues


Darth the Smart Ass

Mini Me

While I was rummaging through a stack of dusty old photographs earlier this afternoon, I found two of myself as a toddler. Call me deluded if you wish to, but damn, I have to admit that I look friggin' cute then.

I think I was rather tickled by the fingers under my armpits.

This was probably the time when my passion for guitars and music was first ignited. It's a pity that it took me such a long time to figure that out. Oh, the lost years I could've spent perfecting my craft. Damn.

Cute huh? Say yes, please. Thank you.

But anyway, I must admit that that was then and now is now. So "cute" is effectively gone from the lexicon of words that can be used to describe me. Come to think of it, I suppose that there are only two words that can be used (and many would use it frequently and affectionately):

"Ah Beng"

And no, I'm not proud of it.

Tomorrow Matters

Tomorrow will have you wishing you never had yesterday if you live for the moment today.

Techno Beng Unveiled!

Alas! The veil is lifted and the mystery is uncovered. It is a moment of revelation that we should rejoice in!

Then again, maybe not.

This guy gives me the creeps man. The very sight of him wiggling his body like a worm send chills down my spine. What's worse is his apparent pride in being able to dance like that.

Urrgggh!!

Here's the video, squirm in disgust!

A Psychopath!?

I was surfing the internet just a little while ago when I stumbled upon a rather peculiar test which claims to be able to show if you have psychopathic inclinations.

The test is pretty simple to do; all you have to do is read a short excerpt depicting a situation with a queer ending, and then you answer the question posed to you.

That’s all.

Here’s how it goes. You can try it out yourself.

Story
A woman, while at the funeral of her own mother, met a guy whom she did not know. She thought the man was amazing. She believed him to be her dream hero so much so that she fell in love with him right there, but never asked for his number and could not find him. A few days later she killed her sister.

Question
What is her motive for killing her sister?

Before I proceed to tell you the answer, I must let you know that if you happen to get the correct answer, it would mean that you could probably become a psychopath. I, for one, got it right.

Hmmm..

Anyway, here it is.

Answer
She was hoping that the guy would turn up at the funeral again.

Onka Judge

If you didn't catch what Onka said at the end, this is how it goes:

Onka Judge (in reply to the judges' decision): "And there's only one judge.."
Simon Cowell (baffled): "Who's that...?"
Onka Judge: "That's me.. Onka Judge."
Simon Cowell: "Oh, Onka.."

Onka Judge: "Don't judge the judge please. Because there is only one judge. Because my name is Mister Onka Judge."

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

G-O-A-T-E-E

Goatee ah, goatee!
Some say swee!
Some say eeeee!
Why grow until so messy?

Goatee ah, goatee!
With you below my lips,
Some say look I like Brad Pitt,
But others say look like China women's unshaven armpit!

Goatee ah, goatee!
Should I shave you away?
Or grow you till '08 may?
Later girl see you run away...

HOW!?

Cannot ah, cannot ah
Goatee ah, Goatee..

Think it's almost time for me to shave my unsightly goatee.

6 Years Old Guitarist

When I was his age, I was playing with Spiderman action figures; what a waste of my time.

Anyway, check out the kid's face at the end when he recieves the guitar!

Victim of Circumstance

At the dawn of hellos
When farewells take a life of their own
There lays a secret yearning
For a brand new beginning
Where solemn goodbyes are embraced
Without the slightest trace of regret

So dear victim of circumstance
Paint yourself a smile
Break into a dance
The night remains young
With the concluding chapter unwritten
Just take one more breath
One more step

I implore thee

Behind every story
A reason lies in quiet slumber
Waiting patiently to be awaken
And unveiled at the last page
Its ultimate fate resides obediently
In the palm of your quavering hands

So dear victim of circumstance
Paint yourself a smile
Break into a dance
The night remains young
With the concluding chapter unwritten
Just take one more breath
One more step

I implore thee
Pick up that dusty quill
And scribble a fairy tale ending
One of flowers basking in golden sunlight
Flirting among emerald blades of grass
Where lions and rabbits retire together
Where damsels and trolls feast in joy

Oh sweet victim
Don’t you wither away
Don’t you bleed yourself dry

A Different Perspective

"When you pray to God for courage, does He give it to you? No, he doesn't. Instead He gives you an opportunity to be courageous; When you pray for God to make your family closer, does He do it for you? No, He doesn't. Instead He gives you an opportunity to make your family closer." - (An excerpt from Evan Almighty that isn't quoted word for word because I have a bad memory. Oh shut up, the gist of it is still there.)

Watch Evan Almighty. It's a dumb, it's lame, it's funny and it's philosophical.

Brilliant, I say. Brilliant.

WAH BIANG!

According to my friend, if you look closely enough, you'd notice that this guy even has a centre-parting!!

WAH BIANG EH!!!

And for heaven's sake, that is NOT ME! I repeat, that is NOT ME OK?